Spicy Chili Chocolate Tofu Fries

chili tofu fries

There’s a bit of a story behind how I got to making Spicy Chili Chocolate Tofu Fries. It may seem like a total duh/of course/who wouldn’t/why haven’t you already/why won’t you shut up sort of decision but it wasn’t. Also? You shut up.

jump past my story to the recipe if you hate stories and by association hate me…

so close you can almost kiss it.I mean taste it.(I mean kiss it.)

so close you can almost kiss it.
I mean taste it.
(I mean kiss it.)

I have a basic shopping list in my iphone notes at all times that I add to whenever inspiration strikes. No matter when I go to the grocery store, I always need my specific basics. The backbone of it all is as follows:

  • cottage cheese
  • skyr.is/siggi’s yogurt
  • peanut butter
  • extra dark chocolate chips
  • Luna Bars (see previous recipe/cathartic moment of facing addiction)

There are a couple of weird things on here. First off, I really do always need a new jar of peanut butter. The fuck is with that? Who eats that much peanut butter? Clearly I do but…that’s messed up. I need to reevaluate my life.

Second, the chocolate chips. I have no idea why I need to have a bag of extra dark chocolate chips in my freezer at all times. I eat a couple here and there with my breakfast/lunch/snacks/dinner/dessert/always but otherwise there’s just a fat bag of opened chocolate chips just hanging out. Always. So this introduces a fun new problem: figure out ways to use those chocolate chips. Before my next grocery visit. Because I always need new chocolate chips.

the steam spicy chili tofu fries emits is great for your pores.and "emits" is great for you budding pretention.

the steam spicy chili tofu fries emits is great for your pores.
and “emits” is great for you budding pretentiousness.

And so, while walking through Whole Foods last night, a shooting pain going through the middle of my back with every breath and footstep thanks to an especially ridiculous gym group cardio class, I dodged the usual suspects on the baking aisle. On to the random vegan shit display case! Where inspiration awaits! Also? Is that salsa? I like salsa!

Thus, Spicy Chili Chocolate Tofu Fries were born. And it only uses a tablespoon of chocolate chips so, after all that, I’m still totally fucked.

one day I'll move that pot behind my every single photo.When my lease is up.

one day I’ll move that pot behind my every single photo.
When my lease is up.

feeds 3



  • 9 oz extra firm tofu, sliced in thin-ish strips…like fries. (Still sweating Wildwood Sproutofu prettttty hard)
  • 1 ½ teaspoon chili powder
  • 1 teaspoon dried oregano
  • ½ teaspoon cayenne
  • ½ teaspoon onion powder
  • ½ teaspoon garlic powder
  • dash of salt


  • 15g extra dark chocolate chips
  • ½ cup chunky fresh salsa (Sabra is both easy to find and totally perfect)
  • 1 teaspoon chili powder


This is really easy but I hope you still think it’s made of magic and good feelings:

Combine your spices for the spice rub. Dredge your tofu fries in the spices, making them all covered and yummy. Get out a frying pan and put it over medium heat. Take some of the tofu fries and lay them in one flat layer on the hot pan and let them sizzle for 4-5 minutes (4 if you cut them a little thinner). Flip and cook a couple minutes more until the tofu fries get a bit of a crisp. Transfer to a plate, sweep out the leftover spice debris (carefully) from the hot pan and repeat until all your tofu fries are cooked.

Spray a wok or that same pan from before with a light coat of cooking spray and put over medium-low heat. Toss the chocolate chips in and let them melt a bit. Throw in the salsa and mix it all up. Add the chili powder and continue to cook until all the ingredients are fully incorporated. Add the tofu fries and keep on cooking, coating all the fries and allowing them to get a little browner/stickier/yummier. When the sauce seems pretty much all on the tofu fries in a satisfying way, remove from heat.

Eat the fries as is or toss them on top/with a 1/3rd of a cup of beans or whatnot for more of a meal. Top with some fresh salsa. Maybe even some mint. I don’t know with you crazy kids anymore.




  1. Wait. There’s someone else in this world with a compulsive pb-buying problem?? I do the same thing!!! Trip to the store = new peanut butter. Always. Between the two of us, we’re probably keeping peanut butter in business…

  2. […] Chocolate tofu fries Spicy Chili Chocolate Tofu Fries Quiche-a-Week Not my recipe but just saw it and think I might give it a go tonight. Right up your alley Viv? […]

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