Quiche-of-the-Week: Jalfrezi Curry Seitan with Homemade Paneer

per 1/6th slice: 225 calories // 18g carbs // 6g fat // 24g protein // 2g fiber // 11g sugar

What’s more satisfying than making your own cheese? I don’t know. Maybe curing some sort of cheese-related disease while telling that bitch you hated in high school that she has that cheese-related disease and you just ran out of compassion and medicine. But probably not. Cheese making is at the apex of all things satisfying.


So I climbed ol’ Mount Accomplishment and made my own paneer, an un-aged Indian cheese that’s kinda my favorite,  to put in my curry quiche-of-the-week. I dodged a lot of skeletons of unsuccessful past adventurers along the way, spit on their anonymous mountain side graves, and made something awesome.

Did you know:
the holes in that spatula are for speed.

Ok, enough of all that majestic and heroic talk. For a bit. Making your own paneer is crazy easy. You mostly just need a cheesecloth and a heavy book. And then another book to read (may I suggest Ali Smith’s playful romp, “There But For The“, available at Strand for a steal?) while you wait for your heavy book to press the cheese down. But we’ll get to that in a moment.

I’ve always wanted a more portable curry.
All my dreams are finally taking a physical form.

Curry quiche! Nectar of the 4-armed goddess!

I was going to make my own homemade curry goodness until I realized ughhhhhhhh that’s going to take foreverrrrrr. Also this exists! And this is tasty!

All I’m saying is if it isn’t contained within a jar, it’s probably not on the bottom shelf of my fridge.
I have a problem with condiments.

So let’s curry our seitan and whip up our eggs and milk and yogurt. It’s quiche of the month week time.

whole paneer recipe: 455 calories // 51g carbs // 10g fat // 43g protein // 0g fiber // 47g sugar

Homemade Paneer
Halved and adapted from US Masala


  • 4 cups of milk (1/4 gallon) – I used lowfat milk for whatever reason
  • 2 tablespoon distilled white vinegar
  • 2 oz yogurt – I used nonfat plain skyr.is because I’m obsessed
  • 1/2 tsp salt

Paneer party time:

If you have a heavy bottomed big pot, good for you. Get it out and bring your milk to a rolling boil. I’m jealous. If not using a heavy bottomed pot (you think you’re superior with your more-than-one-pot, don’t you), use whatever pot you have that’s big enough for 4 cups of milk and bring your milk to that rolling boil very slowly over medium heat so as not to to burn the milk on the bottom of the pot. You’re going to want to stir pretty consistently with a rubber spatula to further ensure milk doesn’t burn.

While it’s heating up, whisk together the yogurt, 2 tablespoons of water, and the salt until it’s smooth. Set aside.

When the milk reaches a boil, turn the burner to low and whisk in the yogurt. It might start to separate at this point but probs not. Take off the heat and slowly add the vinegar, stirring as you do. Within 10-15 seconds, the whey should separate from the milk solids. Let it sit for a couple minutes.

Line a colander with cheese cloth. Pour the milk mixture into the colander and let drain. Bring the corners of the cheesecloth up and tie it closed. Hang from a kitchen sink faucet so it can continue to drain into the sink for about 30 minutes or so.

After it’s totally drained, place the cheesecloth bundle on a cutting board. Set a heavy book on top of it. Let it sit for 40-60 minutes. Once that’s all said and done, unwrap your cheesecloth and cut your paneer into whatever sized chunks you desire. Yay! Cheese!

I’m going to dollop the fuck out of you with chutney.
…is something I need to saymore in everyday life.

Jalfrezi Curry Seitan and Homemade Paneer Quiche
serves 6


  • 25g diced shallots
  • 1 clove of garlic, minced
  • a dash of red pepper flakes
  • 1 8oz package of seitan strips
  • 1/2 cup garbanzo beans
  • 1/2 cup canned diced tomatoes
  • 1/3 cup Seeds of Change Jalfrezi simmering sauce
  • teaspoon of hot curry powder – optional
  • 3 egg whites
  • 3 eggs
  • 1/2 cup milk of choice (almond, but of course!)
  • 2 oz fat free plain yogurt (why, skyr.is of course!!)
  • teaspoons of whatever indian spices your roommate keeps on your spice rack – optional

put that paneer to work:

Preheat your oven to 400 degrees. Spray a pie pan with cooking spray and set aside.

In a pan over medium heat, cook your shallots until they soften a little more. Add the garlic and hot pepper flakes, cook for about 30 seconds or until fragrant. Add the seitan and let it cook for a few minutes. Toss in the chickpeas and diced tomatoes. Cook a little bit again. Add the Jalfrezi sauce and hot curry powder and bring to a light boil. Turn the heat down to low, cover, and let simmer for about 10 minutes. Take off the heat and stir in your delightful homemade paneer. Set aside.

While your curry mix cools a bit, whisk together the eggs, egg whites, and milk in a medium bowl. Whisk in the yogurt. Add the seasonings that your roommate supplies your kitchen with if you like.

Arrange your curry mixture in the prepared pie pan, evenly dispersing all the ingredients throughout the pan. Pour your egg/milk mixture on top. Bake in the oven for 40-45 minutes. Take out. Cool. Cut into 6 homemade paneer quiche slices. Top with some chutney for a wild and crazy time.

I’m a lady of my word.
But mostly a lady.


One comment

  1. Omgg this is so fancy! And you are funny.

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