Quiches have a few constants.
Some more cheese and eggs.
And then there’s Chinese food, which has its own invariable qualities. The most important one being that Chinese food would taste good even if you were eating it from a dirty shoe. It would not taste good, however, if there was also cheese in that shoe. Funny how that works.
Consequently, the marriage of typical Chinese ingredients and quiche seemed perfectly harmonious to me. My brain works funny. I admit it.
A couple notes about the ingredients I used in this quiche…I was feeling lazy, like I do a lot, so I opted for canned straw mushrooms. If I were to do it again, I would undoubtedly use fresh mushrooms sauteed in some garlic instead. So do that. Unless you too are lazy. Which you might be. Ugh wanna just lie on the couch with me for eternity?
I also used more seitan than usual (see overstuffed photo below) to get rid of some leftover Trader Joe’s Beef-less Strips that were taking up precious space in my newly shared fridge. And some baked tofu I had in the fridge. Because Asia. So yeah, that’s a stuffed quiche alright.
Also, no cheese. Don’t even try to add cheese to this. Add the dirty shoe before you add the cheese.
Let’s get these things out and about the kitchen
- 8ish oz seitan strips
- 4ish oz packaged baked tofu, diced
- 1 can (1 3/4 cups) broken straw mushrooms OR (and please do this) 2 cups shiitake mushrooms, sauteed with minced garlic til soft
- 1/2 cup sliced water chestnuts
- 1/2 cup edamame
- 1/2 tsp garlic powder
- 2 tbsp reduced sodium soy sauce
- 1 tbsp chili vinegar dipping sauce
- 1 tbsp chili garlic sauce
- 6 tbsp kimchi (I used Raw Slaw Spicy and it’s all sorts of good)
- 3 large eggs
- 3 egg whites
- 1/2 cup unsweetened almond milk or whatever milk
- 1 tbsp toasted sesame seeds
Now for the weird things to happen we have to
Preheat your oven to 375. Spray a pie pan with cooking spray and set aside.
In a large bowl, combine the seitan, edamame, tofu, mushrooms, and water chestnuts. Toss with garlic powder. Whisk the soy sauce, chili vinegar, and garlic chili sauce in a small bowl. Add the sauce to your proteins and veggies and mix around and around. In another bowl, whisk together eggs, egg whites, and milk.
Evenly spread the protein and veggies in your prepared pie pan. Spoon your kimchi on top so you’ll get a bit of it with every bite. Pour the egg and milk mixture over everything else. Top with the tablespoon of sesame seeds. Bake for 50-60 minutes (it took forever to bake this time because apparently time grows on trees to kimchiches). Let cool, slice into 6 pieces, marvel at your bizarre yet tasty concoction.
Cheese-less, crustless quiche. It’s definitely not your everyday quiche creation. But you know what, it works. Scrambled egg is a notable ingredient in lots of stir fries and for good reason – it goes well with Asian-y flavors. The saltiness of the soy sauce, and the spiciness of the chili sauce and vinegar make this quiche just taste like a savory veggie omelet on steroids. Sometimes I wish I had a skillet that wasn’t too cheap to go in the oven and just call these things frittatas. But frittata-a-week is plain old stupid. So shh.
I really like the kimchi addition not just because “kimchiche” is my new favorite word (it is) but that garlic-y crunch you get every couple of bites is a happy little surprise. Every time. You’ll have to work on your surprised-while-chewing face. And the sesame seeds might have to go on top of every quiche ever from now on.
It’s like eating your steroid omelet on a sesame seed bagel in Chinatown.