Creamed Kale [vegan]


Have you started your Thanksgiving Advent calendar yet? What’s that? That’s not how Advent calendars work? Well if Thanksgiving Advent calendars don’t exist, how did I open a window to a spoonful of Vegan Creamed Kale the other day, huh?
I’m Jewish. Let me have this one. Please.

click to jump to recipe

halloween’s ova! thanksgivin’s comin’!

Vegan Creamed Kale, when not hiding behind windows in weird cardboard calendars that will never, ever make sense to me, is a fun thing to add to your Thanksgiving dinner if only for the opportunity to make something deliciously “creamed” without any cream in it. I am thankful for blowing your mind.

You can’t spell “ramikan” without “I” and “kan!”
I mean, I looked it up. You can;t.

Personally speaking, I’m insisting my father come to me for Thanksgiving this year thanks to the joys of having to work on Black Friday. And while I may not have a kitchen table or dining room table or really any table for that matter, I am going to have Vegan Creamed Kale. We’ll just sit on the floor cross-legged. Festive!

Serve it as is or bake it in adorable little ramekins (the cuter the better) and you’ll have a delicious side dish that your vegan second-cousin who brought a fake turkey with her (SPOILER ALERT: fake turkey recipe coming soon) and meat eaters alike will devour.

first you tell me thanksgiving advent calendars aren’t a thing and now you tell me people don’t eat dinner off window sills.
What’s next? The moon landing was real?

VEGAN CREAMED KALE
makes 4 servings, 75-80g each

Ingredients:

Cashew Cream Sauce – makes a little more than twice as much as you’ll need (but not exactly twice as much) so keep the leftovers in your fridge for the creamed onions you’ll 100% need to make

  • 2 cups raw cashews
  • 1 cup unsweetened almond milk (soy’s okay too)
  • 2 tbs + 1 tsp nutritional yeast flakes (feel free to add a little more for a cheesier cream)
  • ¼ tsp ground nutmeg
  • ¾ tsp salt
  • ½ tsp ground black pepper
  • 1 clove of garlic, minced
  • 10g shallots, minced
  • a squeeze of lemon juice

Creamed Kale

  • 1 cup of Cashew Cream Sauce
  • 5 – 6 cups of kale, de-ribbed and chopped
  • ½ tbs vegan butter
  • 15g shallots, diced
  • 1 oz or so unsweetened almond milk
  • 30g tomatoes, diced
  • salt and pepper to taste

I hope tomorrow’s window reveals an entire pie:

Place your cashews in some sort of canister. Top with enough water to cover them by about an inch. Lightly cover the canister with a paper towel or an unscrewed cap. Let your cashews sit over night. Take in a movie or a warm bath or an evening with your cats.

Drain your cashews and place them in a food processor. Add almond milk. Add enough water to cover everything by about ½ an inch (add a little more if you want it to be a thinner cream but also you want a thick cream so yeah). Puree for a good long while, until everything begins to smooth. It won’t be completely smooth but that’s okay. Don’t drain mixture. That little grit will work its way out. Add the rest of the ingredients to the food processor and puree. A lot. Puree a whole lot. Remember to adjust the spices to your taste as you go. Transfer to a jar or some container.

If you plan on baking your Creamed Kale, preheat your oven to 350.

In a deep skillet, melt the vegan butter over medium heat. Add the shallots and cook a bit til fragrant. Add the kale and toss around to fully coat it with the butter. Cook until tender. Turn the heat down to low and add the 1 cup of cashew cream sauce. Cook long enough for the cashew cream to warm up just a bit and get fully incorporated with the kale. Remove from heat and add in the 1 oz splash of almond milk and stir. Mix in the tomatoes.

Serve as is or bake for about 20 minutes. The world is your meatless oyster.

Baked. If you know what I mean.
(I mean the kale is high.)

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8 comments

  1. Is there a substitute for cashews for those with allergies?

    1. I’ve had good luck with both pine nuts and pistachios for making nut-based creams. Whatever you use, make sure you give them a good overnight soaking.

  2. This looks soooo good! Gonna try to make this tonight.

  3. […] I really want to play in the kitchen. I want to try this recipe for vegan creamed kale, this BBQ kale chips idea and this kale salad, sans bacon, but I still want the goat cheese. Too […]

  4. Thank you for this recipe! I made it last night and it was soooo good! I topped mine with bread crumbs and broiled it for a few minutes to get them brown. Awesome recipe!

  5. La Mariposa Azul · · Reply

    Hello I am going to try and cook this recipe tomorrow but I am unsure of how to properly convert the shallots and tomatoes. Is there another measurement you could recommend for the amounts needed? Thank you!

    1. I’d say 1 to 2 tablespoons of shallots, and at least a 1/4 cup of tomatoes. You can of course use more of either or both if you want to!

  6. Jennette · · Reply

    Love this recipe! I made it at Thanksgiving Time and now it is a regular on our table.

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